Tuesday, August 12, 2008

I do love you...

I'm having a "cold war" with the kids since the weekend. I know ... bad mom! The thing is, they simply ignore what I say and simply do whatever they want. So I thought, pushing them so hard will not make any difference anyways. Having no more patience, nor energy, I let them be. Let them do whatever they want though my heart is tugging me to bother them with their studies. No no.. that I want them to study all the time, but it's their exam week. Eussuv however, is the one got "hit" at the most. Not hit as in HIT.. but as in nagged the most. Why? Because this is one boy who is in his own kid world who thinks the world is all about play! Nothing else matters.

Being a mean mom, I nag and nag and nag at him.. and of course nothing works! Another tips for parents, NEVER nag! Because it definitely brings you nowhere. Your kids simply won't listen. You have to try another approach. Like talking, telling stories, slow-talk... or whatever approach you may take.. but not NAG.

So, what did I do to Eussuv? I had a slow talk with him just before his bedtime. I told him how much I love him and how long he was in my tummy, and how long he was breastfed.. (the longest among all of them!!).. and how could I not love him (he thought I didn't love him and honestly I do feel he's getting further away from me).. I just want him to understand why I'm doing what I do to make him study for his exams. It's not a punishment but an effort that he has to take to learn .. though I don't believe that studying will make him learn, but at least he has better grades or maintain his current grades.

I don't know what's the outcome of this talk yet as it only happened last nite. But I do really hope he understands what I was trying to say to him. He's still such a baby at his age. I'm trying to make him understand what's going on around this world. I did not have this difficulties with Irsyad because he's always the matured one.

I hope I will make some progress with him no matter how long it takes.. I have to try. Please God, give me the patience .. I lack it so much!


mamachupan said...

I am sure I will have as tough time with Iman when he gets to be Eusssov's age.. Some kids just follow rules but some just like to break them.. Nevah mind, I am sure Eussovv is one clever kid who will catch up when the time comes..

Yusni MJ said...

I think the 2nd born is quite a tough one to handle. The 1st born has all the love and the attention when he or she was the only one around. Then come the second one who is the youngest for a short while before the 3rd come along.

Harris was unlike the kakak who like to study and dont have to be reminded on homework and etc. Similar to Eusov, he just wants to play and that's all that matters.

I think what you are doing to Eusov is good because you are treating him like a mature individual and you are communicating with him as a person rather than a mom commanding her children. I am sure if you do this often, you can see result.