Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The things I learn ..

It's amazing what I've learnt or re-learn for the past few years from the kids. Gives me some kind of satisfaction as I educate myself as well as teaching my kids in return ..

Among others:
1) Learn how to tie a necktie as the boys wear real necktie to school. I took it up from the internet. As hubby rarely wears tie and he's not around, I never bother before. Somehow I'm very proud of myself of this new "skill". I'm sure this is like nothing.. but to me, it's really something!

2) Learn the tajwid from Irsyad as I listen to him reading (and reading together) the Quran. This is another something that I treasure. Sometimes I wish to go to agama school with him so that I can learn again. He's definitely more knowledgeable than me in the religion as of now!

3) Refresh my Arabic so that I can help them with their Arabic homework. This is fun!

4) Learn how to use the abacus. Something that I've wanted to learn for a long time. It's very interesting.. Syasya taught me this one and later I help her do her homework using it.

5) Learn to read music notes. My least favorite and most difficult. Had to so that can make help Syasya with her piano lessons. But thankfully she's a fast learner, so I only have to guide her.. not actually teach her.

Life is indeed a learning process. What you learn now may not be useful now and not to you, but it might be later .. and for you to help and to pass on to somebody else.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Que sera sera

Que sera sera, whatever will be, will be.. the future's not ours to see.. Que sera sera.. what will be will be..

Nope not talking about my future.. this is THE future for me already. I was just thinking about the kids these days and what their future may be. Of course we couldn't predict their future but we can plan, guide and support them.

In Malaysia where we are very very much exam oriented, "A" oriented - exam oriented, it's kinda easy to "plan" for the future. You go to school, college, etc, you passed with flying colors.. and taaadaaa.. you have a bright future. Well I would say.. old school of thoughts. These days it's not quite as simple as that. Gone were the days, a piece of paper you called a "degree", is very much seeked for and valued. These days with almost half of the population (my very own estimate by looking at the number of colleges and universities mushrooming around) having at least graduated with a degree, it's hard to say your future is definitely bright! With the supply is definitely surpassed the demand, one must rely on their own initiative, creativity, and unceased efforts to be sure of a bright future. Then again, how do you define a bright future?

Last week when they announced the SPM results - it's like defining a new life to a child going into adulthood!, or like a death sentence to some who did not do well or did not meet their expectations or their parents'!! - I saw tears of joy, tears of dissapointment, as well as shrugs of shoulders. Parents are busy "deciding" or helping their children choose what's next in their lives. But some knew what they wanted - a working world... thinking of making so much money with a high school certificate - much to the dissapointment of their parents.

I have noticed a different trend in parents these days. Parents are more educated and well informed these days. They realised that this is not about them, it's not about what they want, it's about what the children want, what they can do, their strength and weaknesses. No point of asking your child to study accounting when the poor child hates Math or anything close to accounting. We should steer our children towards what they do best and what they like for them to sucess later in life and thus perhaps have a "bright" future. We should no longer be the parents in those days who thinks their children will only be successful if they are accountants, engineers, teacher, or doctors. No doubt all of these professions are well respected, secure and have meanings to it.. but is that what our children want? Besides, there are zillionth other professions in the market today that they can be successful at. Perhaps we can tap their strength at the early age and steer them to the right direction.

We can only plan the future, we can only hope and pray for it to be what we/ they want it to be. The rest will all be in His hands.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

My SAHM Myths

Here are some myths about Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM)... which I have gathered for the few months I am one... this is somehow not necessarily true for all SAHM.

Myth No.1- I can go out and meet my friends whenever I like
NOT! I have to plan any outing days in advance .... so far I only get to go out my friends twice. Other outings are mainly for groceries and market! The thought of leaving the kids somehow terrifies me these days!

Myth No.2 - I can cook nice meals all the time..
I wish! The excitement of cooking wore out after one month or so. I run out of ideas of what to cook after a while. At that then, I leave it to my maid to cook. I think I cook more when I was working. Even my interests of trying new recipes has waned off!

Myth No.3 - I can blog everyday
No way! There are 1001 things to do. I blog more often when I was working! There are always things to do preventing me from punching the keyboard! This entry sits in the draft for a week before I can actually post it.

Myth No.4 - I can read all the books in the world anytime
NOT too! I'm the type who can't put down a book once I start. Once I start a new book, I shut everything else around me until I'm done with it .. yeap.. including kids, housechores, internet, cooking, etc. The world kinda stop when I'm "in" a book. Really.. I can't afford that!

Myth No.5 - I can accomplish the "to do" list that I have compiled when I was working in no time..
Errr... not yet! Oh dear.. I think I really have to improve my time management again. Things are really not done they way I'd want it too.

I'm not sure how other SAHM are doing it. I'm positive that there are ways I can be more motivated and accomplish more other than just kids kids kids!! There are 1001 things that I want to do. I want to take up classes and educate myself, I want to write more, I want to set up a website, I want to do more and more. The time seems to be so short. And I only realise this when I'm a SAHM.

WHY?

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Teach you child some important basic info early

At what age do you think you should teach your child some basic important info about themselves? I would say as young as they are aware of their environemt, know how to use basic things at home especially the phone. These are to me "basic skills" that is important for them to know in case of emergency. And in this day and age, emergency is the last thing that we want.

Why am I rambling about this? Some time early this year, I went to pick up Eussuv from school but as I was late, he already went off with the van. As I was going out from the school, I saw a boy crying as though he was lost. Pitying him, as it was already 6:45pm and the school was almost empty, I stopped and asked him what's wrong. He said his father is supposed to pick him up but he's nowhere to be seen. He also said that his father is usually on-time. My heart went out for him instantly. I can understand his fear. So I asked him where he lives. It happened to be on my way home. Then I said why don't you call your dad using my phone and ask him, and perhaps if he's so late I can send you home .. (me playing the rescuer). And this is what he says.. I don't know his number! Huh? How about your mom's number or house number? Also don't know. Oh dear!! And this is a 9-year old boy. A 9-year old boy whom I believe can already read and count.. do not know his parents or house number!! I was really really shocked. I was actually shaking my head. How could they? Maybe I'm overreacting. But really, this is THE basic info that I was talking about. Since I don't want to be responsible to a child with no info, I handed him over to the school guard and teacher in charged. If he had known the number I would have sent him home and save him from all his misery.

Another similar incident was when Irsyad's friend wanted a ride from me because his mom will be late. I asked him to call his mom first to let her know. Again he didn't know his parents/home number. And this boy is 11. Lucky he knows where he lives! And lucky for him that I actually keep his mom's number by coincident! Mind you, this boy also does not know how to use money as he always brings food from home. He never buys anything at school. No, I was not being nosy but the reason I had to pick him up with my son was because they had to stay back after school for an activity and they had to have lunch at school. So this boy suggested that perhaps my son could treat him lunch. The whole week! Errr.. I don't think so! To me, at least at 11 years old, he should know how to buy things just for the sake of skills (not necessarily for shopping!)

I'm not trying to put down any parents but I believe there are some things that parents should teach their children for their own safety and well-being. When you raise your children, it includes all aspects of their lives, their physical and mental development, their well being, their safety, their environment, etc etc.. the list is endless! Little things like knowing parents phone numbers may seem trivial but it is of great importance. What if the child is lost? What if the child is kidnapped then later managed to get away? There are so many what ifs. And I believe these little things may help. It is part of basic survival skills.

So parents, please, do teach your kids to remember the important phone numbers. But also, teach them not to reveal numbers or address to strangers. Teach them to fear strangers. Teach them over and over again what's good and bad around them hoping that they will be safe in any situation.