Work has taken a toll on me. While I am so ever grateful that the job finally came.. As I couldn't believe myself I am actually doing it, I really am doing it. Life could not be busier. I'm juggling between like 3-4 hats in a day! Time seems to fly faster than ever. I'm constantly counting the hours and days, deadline after deadlines. And it's only been two months. I wonder how life is for people who have been doing it for years. Whatever so.. I'm not complaining. I take each deadline as a new challenge. I brushed aside all the bad sides of it (yeah, already there), all those whispers of nig nag.. Just go ahead with. There's no right and wrong, it's just how people want it to be. Just bear with it, it won't be long. In shaa Allah, it'll soon be over. And I shall reap my rewards.
Amidst my struggle with time, came a sad news of the passing of a neighbor. A young caring father of 5 kids, and no doubt a loving husband. They seemed to be the perfect family I envisioned. The ones who have it all, wealth, happiness.. Just perfect. Or at least that's what I see. His passing really moved me. Their perfect life is shattered by the big C. He succumbed to it after a year's fight. Little that we know it came to that end. When I looked over to their house I wonder how it would be, a wife without a sleeping partner, kids without somebody to call 'Ayah'. It's just heart wrenching to think about. I long to lend a shoulder, a helping hand, an ear.. but they keep to themselves most of the time, especially during his sickness, we were not even able to visit. I felt bad being a bad neighbor, sounds like an uncaring neighbor I was. But then again, I have to respect their privacy. It's been over a week, and I still keep thinking about. I just cannot move on and yet there's not much I can do to help.
Life is indeed too short. Unpredictable. Daunting if you think about it. But one has to go through it regardless. After almost 5 decades of life, I shall embrace it more, make the most of it, enjoy every moment, but most importantly be ready for the next life as there where I will be indefinitely.
