Me, my other half and the kids were on the way to a relative's house when this conversation took place. Talking about Irsyad a.k.a Abang, asking him if he has the interest to go to a boarding school after his UPSR.
Mom : So you think you want to go to a boarding school?
Abang : I don't know
Mom : I think you should try
Abang : Why?
Mom : Well, you'll have more friends, better environment for studying, better study discipline (not studying whike watching TV) .. etc etc
Abang : Oh really? Or is it "Abang menyusahkan korang je duduk kat rumah"??
Mom & Dad : HUHHHH???? How could you say that? We never even thought about it... never ever crossed our minds!! Bla bla la....
And he definitely had a GOOD one from me about it. It made me so sad to think that I have made hime think that he's a burden to us. How could this happen? I think I need to make myself clear to them. I definitely have to spend more time with them and let them know how much they meant to us, to me especially. And this is a PERFECT example of not being a good enough mom!
4 comments:
Actually, just to give another set of opinion on boarding school. I am never pro on this. I think the children need to grow up together so that the bond will be stronger between them.
In terms of discpline or teaching the children, there are no better teacher in the world than the parents. Not just discpline but the value in life is also another thing that only we can set example of to our children. May be I am a control freak, but I want to make sure that I can filter and monitor the input that my children receive from the external world.
I think character building can be done at home also because, one has to learn to share and cooperate with the siblings. I am not ready to let them go so early, may be at the age of 21 kut. Once they are matured.
But of course there are also many positive things that boarding school can offer as well. There are great leaders coming out from boarding school too. Boarding school can also develop character, independence and discpline in the children as well.
Just my two cents opinion that's all.
Yus, I do agree with you. I pun memang bukan pro sangat boarding school ni. But looking at my kids duduk kat rumah with all the distractions in the world and my lacking discipline on them, I think they are better off in school! And to tell you the truth, I'm quite a bad exmple to my kids! All the things that I don't like about them, I think all came from me! Ohhh boy! Reallly..
So perhaps they need to go out of the house and see better example. Haha!
hi! after reading this i must drop a comment. my 10-year-old girl went to her first camping trip last month. sending her off to her school, i wanted to give her a farewell hug and kiss but she went stiff and very unresponsive! i was so hurt because i had always believed i have been a good mum to them all, showering them with kisses and hugs and telling them i love them constantly. so i did not expect such a harsh reaction from her in public. it was like she hated me or something!
i drove home crying and asking myself what i did wrong? how could she?
two days later, she came home and i told her that her brothers missed her so much and what did she say? "i did not think of them at all!"
OMG! she has turned into a very cold hearted girl. like you, she got an earful from me for her unkind remarks.
today's kids i think are very difficult to handle kan?? we can only pray to ALLAH they will become decent Muslims when older --- rozi --
Toyah, may be its not so much as being a bad mom but may be the communication between u and irsyad is not clear.. Some kids are more sensitive (like Irsyad) and need to reassurance from his mommy from time to time.. A lot of hugs, kisses and explaination would probably clear the confusion..
Rozi, may be your daughter was not happy to go and have no way of expressing her frustration?? I think being a parent is challenging at all times and not just today.. we just have to try our best and take it one day at a time..
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